Montessori’s Steady March to “Somewhere”
Paula Lillard Preschlack • January 5, 2016

Vicki Abeles, author of the 2010 documentary, The Race to Nowhere, raises grave concerns about how children are being affected by increased pressures from their schools and their parents to perform at the highest level: Schools pile on the testing and homework; parents pile on after-school sports, lessons, tutoring, and expectations. The results are alarming: anxiety-ridden, unproductive young people who are unprepared to cope with life’s most basic challenges.


The examples Abeles describes in the article “We’re destroying our kids- for Nothing: Too much homework, too many tests, too much needless pressure,” published by Salon on October 31st, 2015, and again this past Sunday in “Is School Making Our Children Ill?” from The New York Times, ring the familiar bells of what has become a mainstream family lifestyle. Even though we rarely come across the described stress and over-scheduling in our community at Forest Bluff School, these messages are important reminders for us to recommit to the main principles of Montessori to raise thoughtful, happy, healthy, productive people. As adults, we can best aid our children on this quest by doing 3 things in our homes:



Prepare the environment: which means providing a routine that gives a child a chance to rebalance herself after the school-day; some time for reflection and reading, creativity/(free time to play), outdoor exercise, and time to make a contribution to the family by helping with dinner or caring for the home. Basically, this means to give the gift of time to be a child and to be a contributing member of a family community. Having a home that is simple, has many books available, a few art supplies and natural outdoor spaces is most likely to inspire reflection, creativity, and activity. It is through reflection, creativity and their own actions that our children form themselves as unique people.


Model healthy behavior: which means to slow ourselves down and take care of ourselves as adults to give back to the world with energy the next day. Reading, taking a walk outside, and spending time in thoughtful conversation are the kinds of healthy behaviors our children need to see from their parents. This teaches them how to care for themselves and re-energize in the same ways.


Provide some freedoms that require responsibility: which means allowing our children to take part in making decisions about their contributions, giving them some freedoms to make certain choices and honoring their personal tastes, with the balance of expecting our children to handle this respectfully and responsibly. This will help them to be gradually prepared for the freedoms and expectations of their future adulthoods.

Raising our children to be prepared for the challenges of life comes down to basing decisions on these three guidelines. This is precisely why the only “homework” assigned to Forest Bluff children and their parents is to read together, prepare family meals, and care for the home environment together. Families follow these suggestions and their children come to Forest Bluff School rested, energized, ready to learn, work hard, make choices, solve problems, think creatively, and give to others. By raising your children this way, and choosing a school that supports this model, you are proving that it is possible to resist surrounding cultural pressures to follow the “race to nowhere.”


Links to related articles:


Is the Drive for Success Making Our Children Sick?


We’re destroying our kids — for nothing: Too much homework, too many tests, too much needless pressure


Printable PDF of this post
A little girl is kneeling on the floor next to a laundry basket full of clothes.
By Margaret Kelley June 25, 2025
Most parents understand the many benefits of involving children in household chores, but many of us struggle with implementing an effective chores routine. Here, we offer some suggestions that aim to simplify the process for families.
Forest Bluff School graduates perform a song onstage at their high school talent show.
By Margaret J. Kelley May 19, 2025
I attended the Lake Forest High School Talent Show for the first time in February (2025). I’d been interested in it for years—watching talented young people with the courage to perform before a crowd is one of my favorite things to do. But it wasn’t until this year, when a friend with a child in the talent show actually procured tickets for me that I finally got around to going. The show runs three nights in a row, and we attended the second night. I brought my own ten-year-old daughter who has a special interest in singing and performing with me. As we settled into our seats and watched the show begin to unfold, I was struck by three things, in quick succession. First was the positive, welcoming community that made up Lake Forest High School (LFHS). There were cheerful parents working the concession stand and selling raffle tickets. There were enthusiastic teenagers, gathering in groups and excitedly finding their seats. Second was the immense array of talent already apparent just a few acts in—The MC’s who entertained the audience with skits and banter between performances, the pit band who played a variety of songs during downtime, the entertaining short videos that interspersed the live performances, and, of course, the extraordinary talent of the participants themselves. We saw various bands, a pianist (“And hockey player!”, more than one person pointed out to me) whose fingers flew over the keys, two girls who tap danced across the stage to Hamilton, a young woman who belted out an opera song that almost took the roof off the school, and many other incredible feats of talent and courage. Third, and most personal for me, were the Montessori alumni I saw that night. They were scattered throughout the crowd, supporting their peers. I saw the dark french braid of a sophomore who I’d known in the Young Children’s Community at Forest Bluff School. I noticed the wide smile of one of the most cheerful Primary students I’d ever known, and I overheard the happy laughter of a confident sophomore who’d graduated from eighth grade and was now surrounded by new friends. But the Montessori alumni who struck me the most that night were the Forest Bluff graduates I saw on the stage, participating in the talent show itself. There were three young women—a sophomore assisting with the live production, a junior who performed as a drummer in two acts and the pit band, and a senior who performed in several acts and served as the stage director for the entire production. These students are all markedly different in their temperaments and talents, and were supporting the show in vastly different ways, but they were all integral to the performance. They were all contributing to the experience for hundreds of students, parents, and community members, sharing their work ethic, skills, and inborn strengths. Two questions began to form as I watched them work together to create this two and a half hour feat—How did Montessori play a part in what these students were able to do tonight? And—How was Montessori able to serve these different young women in ways that allowed them to find their roles in the same shared experience? Fortunately for me (and for you!)I know all three girls personally. I reached out to them individually and asked them if (in exchange for a coffee or tea of their choice) they’d be willing to sit down with me to tell me more about what they did for the show, what the experience was like for them, and what role Montessori had played in preparing them for this work. They all responded quickly and cheerfully—happy to discuss their experiences with the LFHS talent show and their Montessori education.